I finally saw one, part of it anyway

For me this goes back maybe 15 years to the first time it happened. I woke up in the middle of the night with something on top of me. Holding me down. It's happened maybe once or couple of times a year since then. Almost always the same thing. I wake up feeling like something is laying on top of me. I can feel it's weight. Not particularly heavy. Maybe a hundred pounds if I had to guess. I thought it was sleep paralysis in the beginning but over time I don't think so now.

I am almost always paralyzed when when I wake up. I can't move, I can't speak I can't even open my eyes. That's what made me think it was sleep paralysis. But I fight it, and within a minute or so I begin to gain the ability to move, speak etc. All I want to do is yell at the thing to get off me and physically throw it off. Not long after I regain the ability to do those things, the weight disappears and I'm alone in bed with nothing any longer on top of me. The first number of times I never saw what it was. Except for one time a few years ago I caught just a brief glimpse of what I thought was foot standing on the bed next to me.

But the last time it happened was different. I woke up laying on my side with this thing sprawled over my upper body. Laying across my ribs, just under my armpit. I reached my right hand back behind me and managed to grab it right where it's neck met it's shoulder, if you can picture the spot. I was still trying to recover some strength at the time and moving that arm was all I could really do. I grabbed it and started squeezing, partially on it's shoulder and partially on it's neck. I could feel my fingers digging in. Not that I broke the skin or anything, they just sunk into the soft, mushy tissue. A human's shoulder has bones and thick muscle under the skin. It didn't feel like that. My fingers sunk in up to the second knuckle maybe. Like there was nothing really solid inside, just cold, clammy rubbery skin over mushy tissue That's when the thing spoke to me.

It wasn't in an audible voice. It was as if it was inside my head, speaking to me with my own thoughts. Just like you hear people describe it. It said to me, "you're squeezing your own neck." I thought to myself, no I'm not. But it was enough to confuse me for just a second and I let go. I managed to open my eyes and I saw it's arm right in front of me from about the elbow to the hand, kind of draped over me and sticking past my body. With my left hand I reached out and grabbed it just behind the wrist. I gave it a twist and it bent over 90 degrees. Again, it wasn't like a human's arm. It was like it had no bones in it, rubbery cartilage maybe, but no bones. I bent it right over easily. Just after I did that, the thing just vanished as they always do as soon as I start to resist them.

The arm was thin and a gray color. I didn't really see the fingers. I just saw it for a second. Mostly the forearm and wrist. I think I always find them on top of me, because I always fight them if gain consciousness. I think they know that. That's why they always try to hold me down when it happens. Like you or I would do in the same situation. We'd throw our bodies on top of them, grab them in a bear hug and hope they go back to sleep. I think sometimes I do, probably most of the time. But obviously there's times when I don't. I think when they lose control of me, and I'm about to get up and go ape shit on them, they send me back, or leave, whatever the case. I'm still not sure where I am when these things happen. I could be in my own bed and they're in my room with me. Or I'm some place else and they send me back the moment they can't control me any longer. But I always wind up back in bed when they're over.

I still haven seen their faces, or their bodies to any great degree. But I think at least that last one was a Gray, just going by the arm I saw.