Becoming Champion of Unova Takes Balls! [Pokémon]

*Contains: >!pokemon busting humans, sexualized pokemon, sph, puking, references castration!<*

*All characters aged 18+*

You creep along the branch, one hand holding the empty pokeball tight, while your eyes fixate on the pidove in front of you. This is it, you’ll finally get your first pokemon and together, you’ll take the Vertress conference by storm and become Pokemon champions of Unova!

*As you all know, now that you have become adults, you may call yourselves trainers, take care of pokemon and go on your journey! Unfortunately, only a select number of you will be lab-sponsored trainers, receiving their starter pokemon directly from me. But the rest of you shouldn’t fret. We have prepared two pokeballs for you each to go out and befriend your very own starter. Even if a lot of trainers scoff at regular pokeballs nowadays, these are still a sizable investment, especially as you are starting out. So, please, do me a favor and take care of your balls. And by all means, don’t break or lose them!*

Professor Juniper’s words echo in your mind even if, at the time, you only had eyes for her tight white blouse, through which a hint of black lace shimmered, as well as her daringly short skirt. She’s hot in a MILF-y sort of way, there was no doubt about that, and lots of other regions were jealous of Unova and their bombshell pokemon professor. Except maybe the Galarians, but professor Sonia, a bright and bubbly redhead, was technically a historian, so she doesn’t really count. Not that you don’t fantasize about banging that hot piece of ass, her tight pants left nothing to the imagination after a-

*Crack!*

Suddenly, your view shifts forward, and instead of the treeline surrounding Striaton City, you’re looking at the hard-packed ground. The pidove takes off, startled. You feel your stomach drop as gravity grabs you. Wind rushes past you, and you close your eyes. *Arceus, please don’t let me break somethi-*

With a dull thud, a thick tree branch smashes up into your groin, stopping your fall at the expense of your balls. Cross-eyed and groaning, you slide off its side and into a patch of tall grass.

A bright female giggle accompanied by a strange series of thumps erupts from somewhere in the grass, but you can’t really focus on it with your balls screaming at you in pain. You writhe and twist, clutching at your nuts, unable to think straight. It feels like that branch knocked your balls up inside your stomach, and slowly, they’re wandering higher up to your throat. It takes all your willpower to not start crying or puking. Meanwhile, the thumping and giggling are coming closer.

Through a haze of aching balls, you crack open one eye and look at the girl so amused by your intimate pain. She has wide, curvy hips and thick thighs, ending in cream-colored feet. Between them, you spy a pussy like a perfectly pink rose, staring at you from a bush of caramel fur. Clutched to her chest are fluffy bracers that give the illusion of a massive chest. As she giggles, both the fur on her wrists and her long, floppy ears wiggle. For a moment, you think a bunny girl from some porn mag has materialized in front of you to taunt you with her smooth crotch that would never be able to feel the debilitating pain in your sack. Then it clicks, and you recognize the creature in front of you.

*A wild Lopunny! The evolved form of Buneary! What’s it doing here, I have to-* The pain in your balls flares up, and you cough. “Urgh…”

The bunny pokemon is startled by your groan and takes a few cautious steps back. *No, don’t go, this is a huge opportunity,* you think through your aching manhood. With trembling hands, you ignore your scrambled eggs and reach into your pocket to produce a slightly squished Aspear berry, left over from your lunch. For a moment, you wonder if that’s what your testicles- No, don't think about that! With tremendous effort, you sit on your knees and hold the sour yellow-green fruit out towards the pokemon. She sniffs the air, and her giggles are replaced by a constant drip of saliva pooling in her mouth. Her ears start to flap side to side, and cautiously, she steps closer again, tilting her head in confusion. “Lop-lop?”

You gently start talking, your voice only a few notes higher than usual. “H-hey there, Lopunny, I’m a pokemon trainer who is just starting out. Uh… that was a bit unlucky what just happened with that Pidove, but I promise you, I actually know what I’m doing.” The pokemon doesn’t seem to pay you much attention. Its eyes are firmly locked onto the berry in your hand. “I’m still looking for my starter pokemon, my partner, who is going to accompany me on my journey. You look strong, but I can make you even stronger than you are now! In fact, I plan to rock the Vertress conference, become champion and defeat the elite four. Together, we can do it, I just know it!”

The lopunny looks at you, raising an eyebrow as if to say, “*Do you really believe that?*”

“I’m serious, it will be a long and hard journey, but I will keep going until we reach the top. So, are you in?”

The bunny pokemon seems to think about your offer, making cute little squeaks to herself as she weighs the pros and cons. But judging by her drooping ears, she doesn’t seem to think becoming your ‘mon is worth it.

This is too big of an opportunity. With an already evolved pokemon as a starter, you would be miles ahead of the competition. You need to convince her, somehow. “Uh, uhm… I will buy you lots of berries for you to snack on if you become my partner?”

Gently, the lopunny places her paws on the berry in your hand and smiles at you. The stars in her eyes tell you she would march into hell and back for you and your berries. You smile back, elated that she has accepted. “Lopunny…” you say, your eyes starting to tear up, both from emotion and the dull ache in your groin.

This is it. This is the start of your pokemon journey.

Someone crashes through the underbrush and onto the clearing. “I heard high-pitched screaming! Ranger Larissa is here! Where does it hurt, little girl?!”

“Un-un!!” Startled by the noise, Lopunny’s leg twitches and rockets forward, up between your parted knees, and right into your bruised nuts. You get lifted into the air by the kick, your balls warping around the pokemon’s hard leg. This wasn’t just a quick snap-kick, but a proper attack move. Faint beige light glows around Lopunny’s leg as it buries itself into your crotch. Your eyes almost pop out of their sockets – this is ten times worse than falling onto that tree branch!

As you are launched by the nutcracker of a kick, you dimly recognize the person that has just entered the clearing. The bright orange vest over a tight, black top, the thick gloves and rope at her waist immediately give her away as a Pokemon ranger. She’s staring at you, her long, glorious brown curls still wiggling from her dramatic entrance. She's no doubt shocked by the brutal display of testicular violence she has just caused. But wait, why does it look like she’s smirking?!

You don’t have time to consider that, as the whooshing noise of another leg zooming through the air comes from between your legs. You don’t have time to look down, but there is only one thing that sound can mean. At least this time, you get to prepare to have your balls punted into your throat. Glumly, you think, *Ah, so Lopunny knows Double Kick.*

The second kick is almost enough to scramble your eggs completely. With slight crackling, something shifts in your left testicle against Lopunny’s iron-hard paw. Agony explodes between your legs, and you stop seeing or hearing anything. All that you feel, all that you are now, are two pulsating spheres of white-hot pain dangling between your legs.

`Lopunny used Double Kick! Hit 2 time(s)! A critical hit! It’s super effective!`

`You are paralyzed! You can’t move!`

As you sail through the air, a big stain quickly forming on your shorts, both Lopunny and the ranger watch you. When you hit the ground, already curled into a ball to clutch what is left of your balls, both pokemon and human can’t help but laugh at the pathetic sight of a man getting thrown through the air by a hard kick to the berries.

“Pun-un-un-un!”

“Hahahaha, that has to be the greatest nut punt I’ve ever seen! Your children’s children are gonna be walking funny from that one!”

The girl and your new companion both laugh heartily as you can only make strange, wheezing sounds, like air escaping from a balloon. You’d like to tell the ranger off, but somehow the only words coming out of your mouth are shrill cries of “baaalls!” interspersed into your struggle for breath. They only make Lopunny and the girl laugh harder.

After a minute of full-on belly laughter, Lopunny remembers the aspear berry. She quickly hops over to it and, still giggling, bites into it.

The ranger wipes a tear from her eyes and seems to regain her composure, remembering what she was there for. “Oh boy, what a riot... Well, I guess now I know where it hurts. Let’s see here…”

She produces a black and pink device and fiddles with a button. With a chirp from the gadget, the ranger points it toward Lopunny and a robotic, female voice starts talking. “*Lopunny, the rabbit pokemon. It is very cautious and sensitive to loud sounds. When startled, this pokemon will lash out with extremely destructive kicks from its lithe legs that are said to be as powerful as those of a karate master.*”

“Oh, well, sorry about that little one, I didn’t mean to startle you.” The lopunny just stared at the ranger, nibbling on the fruit. The sight made her frown. “Wait a minute, were you actually after this trainer’s berries? Well, I guess I just saw you juice two of them, but… you know what I mean!”

“Lopun?”

“Don’t play dumb, you attacked him to take his berries, and here I thought he tried to force you to... you know...” But Lopunny just tilts her head, making the ranger blush. “To… urgh… to f-… to fu-… uhm, to make a litter with him!”

Lopunny gasped and dropped the half-eaten berry in shock. Scowling, she started to walk towards the ranger. Her growls were cute rather than intimidating, but her intentions were clearly hostile.

“Oh, crap, uh…” The ranger snaps a pokeball from her belt and tosses it out. A large, yellow and blue spider erupts from it in blinding light. “Galvantula, thunder wave!”

`Galvantula used Thunder Wave!`

`Lopunny is paralyzed! It can’t move!`

Thin sparks crackle around the spider’s abdomen, then a series of electric pulses shoot out from it. They strike Lopunny in the chest and reverberate through her body, overloading her nerves. With clenched teeth, she sinks to one knee.

“Oh, bother, where is... Aha!” The ranger picks up the pokeball you dropped when you got your human balls bashed and tosses it at Lopunny. With the same blinding light, she is sucked into it. The ball snaps shut, a red light signifying that the capture hasn’t been successful yet. It wiggles once, twice, and finally lies still. The device plays a little jingle as the light on its button slowly fades. “There we go!”

Finally, the ranger turns to you, still rolling around on the ground, clutching your nuts. She sighs. “Boys get one little kick to the apricorns and act like a Snorlax is taking a nap on their crotch... I won’t be able to take a look at you like this. Galvantula, sticky web. Fixate his limbs.”

With four precise shots of web, your arms and legs are pinned to the ground. You are on your back, legs spread. The ranger scrunches up her nose. “Urgh, did you pee yourself? Because a little bunny kicked you between the legs? Disgusting…” She recalls the galvantula and produces another ball. With more light, a floating, feminine form in what looks like a white kimono materializes before you. Pale blue bumps of ice stick out of her head like little horns, contrasting with the red sash around her waist.

The ranger points to your crotch. “Froslass, you need to freeze this guy’s shorts. I don’t want to touch them when they’re like this. Any ideas?”

“Lass?”

“No, not ice shard. We would just skewer anything he has left down there. Hmm… oh! How about ice punch! Special attack is more your forte anyway, so it shouldn’t make his injuries any worse. I think. In ranger training, they told us that even if they act like they’re dying when they’re hit there, boys' balls are pretty tough,” the ranger says with a stifled giggle. “Okay, ice punch! Freeze those nuts!”

With a trill, the froslass floats over to you. She hovers between your legs for a moment, then draws her little fist back. Ice-type energy accumulates around her fist.

“W… w-wait…” you weakly cry, but it’s too late. A small, strong fist slams into your balls, smashing them into your pelvis.

`Froslass used Ice Punch! It’s super effective!`

The pokemon gleefully chirps with each punch – to her, this must feel like a small punching bag that she gets to lay into. To you, it’s the worst pain you’ve ever felt in your life. The pain goes way beyond what a hit in the nuts should feel like. There must be something seriously wrong with your left nut! But you have no chance to tell this girl and her pokemon, so you just mewl pathetically as your berries are being pounded to poffin dough.

Slowly, the ice spreads over the front of your shorts until they are frozen completely stiff. After three more punches, they rip, and the froslass’s fist connects with your underwear.

“Fro! Froslass!” the pokemon cheers, then rips away bits of frozen shorts. With another punch to your gonads, she freezes your underwear, and with a final strike she shatters that too, exposing your bruised balls and shrunken cock to the air.

`Your genitals are frozen solid!`

“Good job, Froslass! Return. Now let’s see here…” The ranger bends over your groin and immediately starts laughing. “What the hell is that little worm supposed to be?! Is that your dingaling?” she asks incredulously. She grabs your penis, shrunken from the cold, between two fingers and gives it a few tugs, as if to see if it’s real. “That IS your penis! That’s so pathetic, I’ve seen Pichu with bigger dicks!”

Chuckling, she tosses your shrunken penis left and right, playing with it like a toy. Finally, she moved on to the jewels beneath. “Hmm, so, I still see two lumpy shapes in your sack, so that’s good, I guess? They’re swollen, and a bit blue, but other than that, they look fine? Ok, remember my first aid training… Ah! I need to see if they, like, ripped inside the sack, so get ready for that!” Before you can even shake your head, she roughly grabs your entire package and starts squeezing it between her fingers.

“Noooooo!”

The ranger’s idea of palpating your testicles consists of jamming her thumbs as deeply into your nuts as she can manage, and then rubbing them up and down. Dimly, you notice that you are foaming at the mouth while this girl tries to squeeze out the contents of your nuts like they are tubes of toothpaste.

“Hmm, I don’t know… they feel like balls? I’ve never had a boyfriend, so I don’t know what they normally feel li- Uh, uhm, I mean, uh,” she stutters, turning a deep shade of red, “I mean, ignore that!” Embarrassed by her accidental admission of virginity, she somehow forces her thumbs even deeper into the fragile tissue of your manhood.

You squeal and cross your eyes. Was this girl trying to finish what Lopunny started?!

“MY BAAAAAAAALLS!” you scream at the top of your lungs, convulsing as this girl you only met ten minutes ago is crushing the life out of your balls. Then, as if her thumbs in your balls flipped a switch, you get violently sick and it feels like you’re puking out your balls.

“Oh, uh, oops? Hehe,” she laughs, flustered by the severe reaction her inspection of your nuts has produced. Thankfully, your brain surrenders to the testicular agony at that point.

`Pokemon Ranger ♀ Larissa used Squeeze! It’s super effective!`

`Your testicles lost to Pokemon Ranger Larissa! You blacked out!`