The Ballad of Tuan's Lost Love - All Parts (H&H Spin off)

*Prequel -* [https://www.reddit.com/r/BallbustingStories/comments/1ag3vef/211/](https://www.reddit.com/r/BallbustingStories/comments/1ag3vef/211/)

*Part 1 - Hormones and Heartstrings*  [https://www.reddit.com/r/BallbustingStories/comments/1i6ix5a/the\_dilemma\_of\_desire\_part\_1\_hormones\_and/](https://www.reddit.com/r/BallbustingStories/comments/1i6ix5a/the_dilemma_of_desire_part_1_hormones_and/)

*Part 2 - Cole's Pills* [https://www.reddit.com/r/BallbustingStories/comments/1i9p8ju/the\_dilemma\_of\_desire\_part\_2\_coles\_pills/](https://www.reddit.com/r/BallbustingStories/comments/1i9p8ju/the_dilemma_of_desire_part_2_coles_pills/)

*Part 3 - Your Balls, My Steel Toed Boots*
[https://www.reddit.com/r/BallbustingStories/comments/1joq6a7/the\_dilemma\_of\_desire\_part\_3\_your\_balls\_my\_steel/](https://www.reddit.com/r/BallbustingStories/comments/1joq6a7/the_dilemma_of_desire_part_3_your_balls_my_steel/)

*Part 4 - Carla's Concepts*
[https://www.reddit.com/r/BallbustingStories/comments/1k63e45/the\_dilemma\_of\_desire\_4\_carlas\_concepts/](https://www.reddit.com/r/BallbustingStories/comments/1k63e45/the_dilemma_of_desire_4_carlas_concepts/)

*Cole's physician, Dr. Anh Nguyen thinks back about the guy she unmanned, after handling his situation and an interaction with his primary urologist, Carla.*

**Part 1**

*Cole's Arrival*

Cole laid on the paper-covered bed, the light blue gown he wore gaping slightly at the back, as he stared at the ceiling with a concerned frown. The pain between his legs had dulled from a medieval level torture, but he still felt electric surges of pain with every small movement he made. His cheeks were still raw from the sobbing earlier, and he tried to ignore the pain when the door opened with a calm swoosh.

A woman in her mid 30s, wearing scrubs and a white coat with a stethescope around her neck walked in, skimming her chart before looking at him with a raised eyebrow. She stood confidently, entirely composed and unimpressed with whatever drama Cole had gone through that preceded her arrival.

"I'm Dr. Nguyen", she said, in a pleasant yet efficient voice. "I'll be cross examining your injured area with the report your campus nurse sent me, and managing you today".

Cole blinked. "Oh. Uh, cool. Yo-You're a..."

"A doctor", she said smoothly, already snapping on a pair of gloves, before lifting up his penis so she could get a better look at his testicles. "You'll be surprised how common that is nowadays".

He stared at the ceiling again, avoiding eye contact with her. "This is humiliating.. Being.. like this", as he gestured at to his lower body saying, "...in front of a woman..".

Without even looking up from her examination, she retorted, "Your testicles don't scare me, Cole", as he died a little more on the inside.

"The report tallies with what I'm seeing... your body temperature is higher than it should be, and from your genital exam it appears you have a complete testicular rupture on the left side.."

“Oh my god,” Cole whimpered.

"I'm going to be completely honest with you. There is a loss of blood flow to your left testicle, and the gonadal tissue isn't salvageable. I won't be able to save your testicle."

Cole stopped breathing when he heard her say that, as his blood froze.

“You mean I’m going to lose it? As in, it’s gone? Gone gone?”

She nodded gently. “You’ll still have one functioning testicle. It should be enough to maintain hormone levels, fertility, and function.”

Dr. Nguyen gently covered him back up. “We’ll get consent forms ready. You’ll go in for surgery in the next hour. I'll be performing your orchiectomy myself. Try to rest.” And with that, she exited as smoothly as she arrived.

*Cole Awakens*

His mind was fuzzy, a thick fog clouding his thoughts as he slowly surfaced from his unconsciousness. The sterile, fluorescent lights in the room felt too bright, as he groggily tried to make sense of where he was. As he made an attempt to get up, a sharp, fiery pain gripped his genitals. His entire groin felt as if it was on fire, as he gasped in shock from the sensation, clutching at the sheets as he breathed in ragged uneven whimpers.

Every breath he took sent a wave of excruciating pain from his scrotal area through his legs and abdomen that made him want to scream. As he continued laying still, the pain begin to subside as his vision cleared. He swallowed hard, unable to move his legs without them brushing against his ball(s), to keep his hospital gown from riding uncomfortably high. He could feel the cold air of the hospital room on his completely exposed sex organs, as his face flushed noticing the figure standing nearby watching him. It took him a second to recognize her - Dr. Nguyen.

"Don't move", she said, in a calm yet firm voice. Her eyes scanned the visuals on the monitor beside him, but she kept glancing back at his lower body. "I've just completed your.. operation."

He blinked again, his throat tightening as he awkwardly tried to cover himself. "Why.. why do I feel like this?".

With an unreadable expression, she glanced at him. "I'm Dr. Anh Nguyen. I just performed surgery on you and you're still in recovery".

He winced again, as the reality of the situation started to sink in. "W-what happened to me? I don't.. remember..".

Her gaze sharpened, as she replied with a steady tone. "You suffered a blunt force trauma to your external genitalia after getting assaulted by a woman. You were admitted with cold sweats, nausea, and severe lower abdominal pain due to a rupture to your left testicle."

He felt his stomach drop, as his memory slowly started returning. "W-why do my testicles still hurt so badly? Are they going to be alright?"

She paused for a moment, as if deciding how to answer. "Her kick... caused enough damage to your left testicle that it could not be saved. I had to remove it. The other is fine, but it is still very delicate from the kick. You need to take it easy, and let it heal". She did not sugarcoat her words, keeping her professional care beneath the bluntness of it all.

The pain in his groin now was the physical manifestation of everything crashing down. “I... I can’t” Cole's voice cracked as he spoke, his emotions suddenly a lot harder to hold back. “I didn’t think... what does this mean for me now? For... for my life? Will I be... a man?”, he asked weakly, the question slipping out before he could stop himself.

She took a deep breath, her expression softening ever so slightly as she leaned in. "You're still as much of a man as you were, Cole. You will need some time to adjust to the changes in your body, but life will go on."

He nodded slowly, the weight of her words pressing on him. He wanted to say something, but words felt like they wouldn’t be enough. He just stared up at the ceiling, feeling smaller than ever before.

She gave him a small, almost imperceptible smile, as she left the room for him to recuperate, her thoughts heavy with remembering of an incident from her past. Tuan.

**Part 2**

*Tuan's Not So Happy Hour*

The dim neon glow of the honky tonk saloon themed bar painted his face in hues of blue and red, casting shadows that bared his rogue charm and sharp, handsome features. He swirled his glass, lost in his own thoughts as he avoided dwelling too long on memories from years before. He was lean now, almost gaunt, and yet his posture hinted at a body that once knew power, and great strength.

Across the room, a skinny, shy woman sitting alone glanced at him once more nervously, before quickly diverting her gaze at the hint of him looking her way. He felt a familiar stirring in his viscera, a gentle flutter that he felt when a woman is in need of bridging the space without knowing how. He smiled faintly as they made eye contact, before he looked away again, deciding to spare her the eventual awkwardness. It wasn't worth the trouble anymore.

Finishing his drink, he set his empty glass down and rose to leave, as another girl appeared, voluptuous and radiating confidence. Her eyes glistened with expectation, as she purred, leaning in to him, her generous chest pressed close to his body suggestively. "Leaving so soon?" His eyes ventured downward for a second, but he leaned back, putting a distance between his body and hers, with a polite yet distant smile.

Her confidence visibly gave away for a moment, unused to the sting of rejection. Without another word, he ignored her confusion and humiliation, sidestepping her gently and leaving for the door. The cold outside air kissed his flushed skin, his wandering mind sharpened by the alcohol but softened by a melancholic wandering. With slow, measured steps, he turned to look at an alleyway reminiscent of the ones near where he had once schooled in this town, his hand moving forwards to cover himself, tracing an ache deeper than his flesh could hold.

The thoughts he had been running from caught up to him at that moment. Anh Nguyen. Sharp-tongued, clever Anh. Memories of her luminous mischevious eyes and devastating smile burned into his mind. And then, the alley came back to him - as he lay in the dirt breathless in twitching spasms along his thighs and belly, watching her walk away without a care, as his hands cupped himself as if it would hold together what had already unraveled inside them.

He stopped, as reality pressed sharply against his drunken memory. Anh had moved forward, chasing dreams across the sea and forgetting everything she left behind. He stood silently for a long moment, before continuing down the empty street, a ghost chained to what Anh had done to him so many years ago.

*Anh's Late Nights*

Dr. Anh Nguyen's laptop screen glowed against her tired eyes, the hospital's research portal pulling up an old file in the silent late night in her office. She hadn't thought about him in years, not since leaving the province they grew up in together for med school.

Tuan: the first boy who ever cornered her alone to hurt her, with his smug grin, convinced that he could always take whatever he wanted because he had always gotten his way. The boy she'd dropped and turned into a sobbing, shivering wreck on the alley floor with one sharp knee, and a string of furious words after..

But now, scrolling through old provincial medical records, she found the truth behind the rumors whispered by the girls who spent a lot of time wondering about his anatomy.

“Unilateral cryptorchidism diagnosed during routine check-up—left testis absent.”

Her breath caught. She'd always assumed that her kick did more damage to his ego than anything, if that rumor was even true. Yet every line she skimmed from his records told a different story: multiple hospital visits, endocrine consults.. and a heart stopping note: Patient presented with complete testicular rupture (right side), with pre-existing monoorchism. Emergency unilateral orchiectomy performed within 60 minutes of imaging.

"Patient was transferred to our facility 4.5 hours after sustaining blunt force trauma to the gonad. Initial presentation included nausea, cold sweats, pallor, and severe lower abdominal pain. The patient was unable to ambulate independently and was curled in a fetal position upon arrival.

According to attending staff at the district clinic, patient was discovered in a local alleyway by a shopkeeper, approximately 90 minutes post-incident. Patient was unresponsive to verbal questions but demonstrated protective posturing and involuntary groaning consistent with acute testicular trauma.

The patient refused to discuss the origin of injury in detail, citing “a personal matter.” Witness reports from the referring team suggest the injury was sustained during an altercation with a female peer."

Tuan was no longer a mono-orchid. Because of her single knee, he was now, a eunuch. Dr. Anh Nguyen leaned back in her chair, the fluorescent lights too bright for her eyes suddenly. Her memory unfolded again: the dusty road back home, his laugh sharp as gravel and her pulse roaring. She felt his hands on her, the yank and heat of his rage. And then her kick - fierce, practiced. Tuan crumpled, gasping, as she remembered the shock in his eyes and a feeling he couldn't quite comprehend. It had always been a stinging victory for her, and a lesson he would never forget. She now realises that she might have taken away the only testicle that Tuan possessed.

She closed the file and shut off her laptop, now staring at her reflection in the black screen. In her white coat and poise, a woman that performed surgeries with an ice-calm demeanor. But for this night, she felt more like brittle, thin glass than ice.

She pressed her fingertips against her temple, replaying the scene again. Tuan's yelp and subsequent moans, her adrenaline, as a soft knock at her door snapped her out from it. A night nurse handed her some charts, unaware of the storm blooming inside her ribs. When the door clicked shut again, she restarted her laptop, pulling up Tuan's chart again.

Her regret now was not enough to rewrite the consequences she'd unwittingly forced Tuan to bear for the rest of his life. Nothing ever could.

**Part 3**

*The Old Town*

At their school, teasing had always been something of an art form. The girls especially, knew just how to fluster the boys with a comment or the mere suggestion of the weakness of certain parts of their bodies. The favorite talk amongst them at the time, was how the biggest, toughest guy in their class had instantly collapsed when this girl aimed a delicate, yet deadly kick between his legs aimed just right.

The girls giggled talking it, while the boys blushed furiously at their innocent sounding laughter, hoping the moment would pass quicker.

Tuan had always been the center of attention for these girls. His lean frame, and angular jaw drew admiring glances and sighs of longing from nearly every girl. He was smart, charming, and athletic, and he had broken many hearts just by walking through the halls. But there was one girl who never seemed to notice him, or simply chose not to, in the way he desperately wanted and longed for.

Anh Nguyen.

She wasn't like the other girls. Quiet, studious, and a little nerdy. Her shyness was equally charming as it was maddening for him. She wasn't one of the prettier girls, and yet he could not stop noticing her graceful curves, or how her black hair looked under the warm sunlight, that same light illuminating her delicate features. He hated himself for it, but he could not keep away from tormenting her as it was the only time she paid him any attention. He would tease her openly, especially in front of the pretty girls that she had secretly envied so much. Until the day that she finally snapped.

They were standing by the lockers after class, surrounded by a flock his giggling, shiny haired girls. Tuan had just launched another casual insult at her, who had been having a particularly bad day. She usually ignored him, but this time, Anh turned back at him slowly, her eyes burning with a quiet rage that he had never seen before in a girl.

"Oh, Tuan", she said softly, in a deceptively sweet and dangerous voice. The crowd grew silent, sensing drama in the air. "I understand why you have to act so tough around me. It's probably so tiring pretending to be a real man, all the time."

A girl laughed nervously, as Anh took a slow, deliberate step closer to him, lowering her voice as her expression turned from burning malice to mocking sympathy.

“I heard from someone very reliable that you have… well… only half the organs you're supposed to. Maybe that's why you're so mean - you're making up for it.”

Tuan felt his blood freeze, as he took his eyes off Anh, glancing around to notice his ex-girlfriend in the circle, her eyes glistening with a malicious satisfaction. She had revealed his secret, something that was embarrassingly personal and deeply intimate to him, that she had found out when she gave him a blowjob a few weeks ago.

When he turned back, Anh now stood right in front of him, leaning even closer, with a slight smirk curving on her lips. "One little nut only?", she whispered to his face, still loud enough for all the girls to hear, her tone dripping with mockery.

The laughter burst forth behind him, as he stuttered finding a response, as he stood rooted to the spot, his cheeks burning red as his mouth hung open and dry and unable to speak. The laughter echoed cruelly, replaying her words and her expression in his mind over and over again.

Before he could react, Anh pushed past him as he stumbled and lost his balance briefly. "Excuse me, Tuan. I need to go home to study." She walked away gracefully, as he remained stunned, alone in a circle of girls who giggled openly at his newfound vulnerability.

He did not know how long he stayed frozen in shame, but his rage built slowly, hotter beneath his collar until it had overwhelmed him. When the final bell rang, he had no hesitation. He knew exactly what he was going to do.

*Alley Of Broken Dreams*

Anh was alone when he caught up with her after school, walking quickly down a shortcut she always took to get home. The alley was narrow, now bathed in the warm golden haze of a Vietnamese sunset. The kind of place that swallowed sound.

Keeping her head low, she glanced back several times, sensing someone's approach. Once. Twice. Her eyes were wide behind her glasses, but there was nothing, just the silent hushes of the path behind her.

And then Tuan stepped out from between a row of dumpsters like a shadow, sudden and blocking her way. She spun around to run, but he surged toward her.

"Anh!", he growled, grabbing her wrist and spinning her toward him. "How dare you embarrass me like that in front of all those girls!"

"Let go of me!", Anh tugged at his grip, her bravery from that afternoon quickly evaporating into alarm.

"You think you're tough now? You had no right to do that - to me! And then walk away as if nothing happened!"

“You started it, Tuan - you're always humiliating me, always treating me like trash!”

"But you had no right to talk about my -", his voice cracked, and he tightened his grip as if it could hold his sentence together. It was almost as if he could not bear to say it out loud, like even he did not believe it was real.

"Your what?", Anh snapped back defiantly, although her voice trembled slightly. “That stupid ball that you think makes you a man??”.

Her words hit him like a tight slap in the face. His ears burned. He couldn’t say it, but he knew she knew. It wasn't just the insult now, but how close she was now, the heat of her breath hitting his face. It made him almost dizzy, smelling her breath's dry saliva; sharp and faintly sour filled his senses, and beyond that, the scent of her skin. Her sweat, of nerves, fury, and something unapologetically female.

For a terrifying second, it was clear to him that whatever he thought boys were supposed to be to girls - figures to be admired, respected, or perhaps even invited into the intimate embrace of a woman - he wasn't. Not anymore, and his body seemed to know that first as a strange coiling heat flared in his abdomen - not quite arousal, and a tightness in his legs froze him as he felt a shiver run through the softest parts of him.

He doubled down, tussling awkwardly with her for another moment, as her books fell to the ground, scattering pages and notes all over the dirt. Anh struggled in his grasp, her panic rising as he tightened his hold on her, anger clouding his judgement and awareness. "Tuan, stop!", she cried out desperately, her voice breaking. “Let go, Tuan!” she said again, but firmly, a hint of bravado threading her panic now. Fueled by male humiliation beyond reason, he hissed at her, pulling her in as he leaned closer.

"You wanted to make me weak, didn't you? Now, let me show you what a real man ca-".

He was leaning in as he said this, when Anh's gaze darted downwards, as she remembered, right when she needed to remember it most. The rumor, first heard whispered behind cupped hands in the girl's locker room, how Tuan's ex-girlfriend, bitter and scorned, had told everyone what she had discovered when she got naked with him. How he was not like the other boys, where he was missing something essential where men carried their pride.

Upon realizing his intention, what he meant to do to her - not just to scare or hurt her, but to cross and line and take something from her that he had no right to take, something shifted. She now wore a glint in her eye, sharp and terrifying, despite the tremble in her breath and tension in her body's posture.

The kind girls only wore when they decided a boy was now a threat and no longer mattered, as a prospect, or even a person. The kind of post-adolescent vengeance that only girls wielded with such clarity, as her body hummed with nerves and the quiet rage of girlhood. She was about to show it to his, ignoring every cultural taboo now to send a message to him in the one spot girls were taught never to kick a boy in.

It was supposed to be off-limits. The one place a girl never aimed for, even in anger, because she could injure him in a way he would be unable to create life. He won’t be able to have kids. He won’t be able to marry. But what about her? What he was about to do her future? Nobody ever worried about the girls like her and their futures. As if her rage did not matter and she was once again, just a thing for a man to grab as if she belonged to him. With his hand tightly wrapped around her wrist, she could not care less about his body, his future bride, or if nothing living would ever come out of him again.

She remembered too, her older sister showing her exactly where to strike if a boy tried to hurt like this, if he ever thinks he can take from you what isn't his to take, you aim right there. At his vulnerability, the very thing that she had mocked him for. Without thinking, she wrenched her leg back and drove her knee upward with all the desperate strength she had, right into where she would have expected to find his private parts. It connected with a sharp precision, and a jolt ran up her leg when she felt her kneecap collide with something soft, something fragile feeling, as a delicate squishiness compressed under bone. She did not need to look to know; his immediate reaction told her that she'd hit him where she could hurt him most.

Tuan did not try to fight it. He did not try to stay standing or hit her, didn't spit curses at her like she half-expected. Tuan doubled over immediately, his enraged expression dissolving into a shocked, choking look of betrayal. He loosened his grip, dropping to the ground hard, clutching desperately at himself to curl into the fetal position like an injured animal. Anh took a step back, breathing fast and hard, her knee still tingling from the force of the impact. Her heart pounded in her ears, as the fabric of her top clung to her sweaty skin, her chest rising in frantic uneven waves.

She couldn't believe what she had done. And then she did. In vivid memory, she stood over him, a sense of satisfaction curving her lips as she watched him suffer at her feet.

"What's the matter, Tuan? Did I hurt your ball?", the words she almost couldn't believe saying flying out from her mouth dripping with scorn. "Aww, come on, don't cry! I barely touched you, and you're completely useless!"

Tuan didn't answer - couldn't answer, really, as he tried to speak, but the only sound that managed to escape his lips was a gentle gasp, followed by a long moan, tears leaking from his lashes as he rolled helplessly in the dirt.

"One little kick? That's all it took? Pathetic..", she said, nudging his trembling body with her shoe. She watched him shudder feebly with each nudge, moaning softly. She took a slow step closer, letting her presence loom over him now. He struggled for an instant, before looking up at her now slowly, his face pale and glistening in sweat. Tilting her head, with one hip cocked, she eyed his agony.

She knew the view he had of her body from that angle, but she was too transfixed on him to care. What he was going through because of what she just injured, right there between her knee and his pelvic area. His little, helpless convulsions, his knees pulled up to his chest, his arms cradling his genitals like he could protect that area. She had no idea that beneath his gasping, she had already caused something terrible to begin - something permanent.

And then she laughed. God help her, she had laughed. A sharp incredulous sound, bubbling out of her chest before she could stop it. How he had cornered her seconds ago, now a sobbing, shivering wreck on the alley floor. She bent down in front of him with a deliberate casualness, slowly picking up her books and ignoring his desperate writhing like a fish pulled out of water.

And then, she finally left him alone, walking away to leave Tuan to deal with the throbbing pain beyond anything he had known, which would eventually etch itself into both their lives forever in vastly different ways. This would be one of the last times he ever saw her. Her skirt swinging gently with each step, her silhouette clean and proud against the late afternoon sun.

And then, another wave of pain rolled through him like a curse blooming in his groin. He jerked involuntarily, his body folding in a bid to protect something that he had already lost. A tiny moan escaped him again, the kind of sound no one would ever expect a man to make, and still, she didn't turn. He could do nothing but watch her shapely figure disappear down the rest of the alley, steady and unhurried as the last pieces of himself slipped away with her.

He remained in the fetal position, completely disabled as the hours passed, unable to even crawl out from the same alley had had followed Anh into. His body shook in involuntary spasms, as time warped around him. He didn't know how long it had been. Minutes. Maybe hours. No one came.

And then a sound of a broom, followed by a woman's voice, older, and close. It was nearly dusk when she stepped outside to sweep the stoop, when she found him. Medical help arrived shortly after, the sirens first. Then the stretchers. Then the gloves. The doctor delivered the bitter news: his teste had been injured badly, and to save his life, it had to be removed.

**Epilogue**

After the surgery was complete, Tuan started feeling better immediately, and healed very well. At least, as well as he could hope for in these circumstances. Multiple hospital visits later, it was confirmed that his penis had healed fully, although he would soon have to begin long-term hormonal management.

In the first few weeks, he had moments of feeling almost normal. But it would leave him as quickly as it would emerge, reminding him that his body was about to undergo some changes. But healthcare was never reliable in their province, and his supplementation came in batches, months of stability followed by months of drought. It made him angry sometimes, or tired in a way that sleep couldn't fix.

On better days, he often found himself together with some of the girls he had grown up with, who did not mind, and remembered him before the alley and the scalpel. Sometimes, after one drink too many, after long and lingering gazes that said "I still remember who you really are", they ended up seeking comfort in each other's bodies. But even when the desire for her rose in him, when his body remembered how to want, it never lasted. They had all wanted to start a family someday, and he could no longer do that.

Tuan understood, every single time. And maybe he did. But either way, he always wound up alone again.

After she had pressed her gloved hand to a swelling on Cole, and the operation she performed on him and the difficult news she had to deliver to him after he woke up, memories of Tuan flooded her. For a long time after that, Anh would feel pangs of regret for what she did to him, after she uncovered old provincial medical records of the aftermath. But she would eventually rarely think about Tuan, the alley, or the soft, broken sounds he made after he fell.

After all, it was just a moment in her life to her, even though it defined the rest of his life to him.