3-month Review for New Chastity Couple

I'd like to provide a 3 month review for a new FLR / chastity couple.

My wife and I are in our early 40s with kids. I detail our story more in another post. She had some traumatic experiences with her pregnancies that turned her off to sex. We didn't have any other kind of intimacy because she so intrinsically connected that with leading to sex. We had become a dead bedroom.

I introduced chastity from the perspective of making her feel safe during intimacy. Give her physical control of the situation. She was open to the idea. I expanded it to an official FLR dynamic because I wanted her to lead us beyond just sexually. We wrote up "Play Guidelines" which was a fairly expansive document that covered the chastity specifics, but also had rules regarding our overall behavior in the relationship.

That's something I highly recommend, putting things in writing on a piece of paper gives them substance. I don't attempt to escape or circumvent the chastity device because it is written down I don't do that... or else. I think twice before I express any anger or aggression because we considered that, wrote it down, put consequences to it, and I try to find other ways to communicate. She had commitments as well of course. All of them designed to drive us more positively together.

Chastity has been 24/7 from the beginning, only unlocking for hygiene and sex. We use one of the well-known resin-printed brands of cages. I have an aqua blue cage she picked out that's 2 inches short of my flaccid length that seems perfectly comfortable. I have several sizes of cock rings from trial and error, and honestly that's not a bad thing because sometimes I want something more or less restrictive depending on the activity and length until next unlock. We also have a ring strap, it helps tremendously when you're an endowed fellow.

Let's talk about outcomes.

The sex has been outrageous. We're on an every two weeks pace, as she puts it "to reduce your risk of prostate cancer." I have at least one story in my profile of some recent shower sex.

Just last night, she broke Locktober early, not to have sex with me... She gently rubbed me in my cage until I was a puddle, then she unlocked and gave me a dominant handjob I didn't know she was capable of. She brought me to the edge over and over again until my moans woke the dead, sitting behind me and keeping my legs spread with her own while gripping and squeezing my balls in one hand and stroking my cock in the other. She wouldn't allow me to touch her during the whole session.

Nonsexual intimacy is now hours every early morning and evening. We are always cuddling, massaging, scratching, and very often without clothing and not leading to sex.

We communicate better. Some of that was written into our FLR agreement, but I think the power exchange and vulnerability of the relationship play naturally leads to being more open with communication.

I am way less lazy, and contribute more than I ever did to our homestead. I can't put my finger on that one, it's sort of a rising tides lifts all boats. No self gratification means more time to spend, no daily orgasms means lots of pent up sexual energy to redirect, official FLR dynamic means there's accountability, mood improved and feeling closer to her I just want to do more to please her.

It's been a relationship changer for us. Could all this have been accomplished outside of a kink dynamic? Maybe, but the space and structure the kinks created for us helped.